Tidings of Comfort and Joy

Something I’ve become more aware of lately is the fine line between comfort and complacency. A major factor in unhappiness is the inability to be content with what you have, so finding joy in the everyday moments without always wanting or needing things to be different, is critical. The flip side, though, is that you can get too comfortable and stay stuck in your comfort zone, experiencing less of life than you could be, because complacency, inertia or fear hold you back from trying new things.

Ray and I joke about our increasing tendency to avoid evening activities. We like our quiet routine of turning on Netflix at 8:30 and going to bed at 10:30. Ray goes curling two mornings a week but often gets asked to spare on a Friday evening and it’s like, “8:00 pm? Really?” He still says yes, but there’s that hesitation. Part of us thinks we should just accept the fact that that’s what we enjoy doing in the evenings, and part of us worries that we’re turning into old fuddy-duddies before our time.

Having Nick home for the holidays is a good motivator. We were trying to decide on a Christmas show to watch on Netflix and I said, “This one looks good, but it’s in Norwegian with English subtitles.” Nick said “Oh, I’d be down for that! I’m teaching myself Norwegian on Duolingo.” Of course you are.

When we’d finished the show, Ray and I headed to bed and Nick went downstairs and spent an hour or two working on his bouldering technique. He’s constantly striving to improve himself and pushing himself outside his comfort zone, while I’m just kinda coasting along, enjoying life, but not really challenging myself. I thought parents were supposed to be role models for their kids, not vice versa.

It’s the time of year for reflection and even though I have much “comfort and joy” in my life (for which I’m very grateful), I’m trying to think of ways to add some adventure and personal challenge into the mix next year, particularly with my 60th birthday on the horizon. The year I turned 50 I set myself three challenges: run a half marathon, run a 10K in under an hour, and one that I’ve forgotten. I achieved the first two, and presumably the third one. Perhaps I need to do something similar for 2024, though not necessarily in the same category.

We went to a Jack and the Beanstalk Panto in Port Hope last week and a Motown Christmas Concert in Cobourg, which helped put me more into the Christmas spirit. The snow this week helped as well, even though it’ll be gone by Christmas.

We revived our Games Night tradition this week. Last winter, we had ten games nights and competed in: Sequence, Pool, Darts, Gingerbread House Building, Ticket to Ride, Rummoli, Wizard, Bowling, Pictionary and Bocce Ball. The number of wins we each had were: Ray – 6, Rick – 4, Bill – 3, Lorrie – 3, Josee – 2, Carolyn – 0.

It was our turn to host so Ray, feeling somewhat sorry for me, picked a game he knew I’d be good at (i.e., any type of word game). When we were last in England, we were introduced to a game called Poetry for Neanderthals, where you have to get your teammates to guess a word, but you can only use single-syllable words to give them clues. If you slip up and use a two-syllable word, you get whacked by your opponent with an inflatable caveman club. For our version of the game, my sister made up a bunch of cards with Christmas-themed words and we used a pool noodle / candy cane instead of a club. Once we went through those words, we used a random word generator on the computer. There were some interesting strategies deployed, like using hand motions or only saying the first syllable of a word, which – though entertaining – were disallowed. We all got whacked at least once, but with the help of my teammates, I got my first win of the coveted silver beaver award.

Wishing you all much comfort and joy this holiday season and a healthy and peaceful 2024!